I would hope that even the most die-hard Woody Allen fan would admit that the man’s work is either hit or miss. When he’s on, he’s on fire. When he’s off, you get The Curse of the Jade Scorpion. I can’t quite get a handle on which end of the spectrum Vicky Cristina Barcelona will fall, since the trailer really doesn’t give anything away. No, really…there’s not even any dialogue in it.

From what I can cobble together based on the snapshots in the trailer and my own reading about the film, Javier Bardem (looking far less terrifying than the last time I saw him) is a Spanish artist who gets it on with a lot of women. He’s sleeping with two American tourists (one played by Allen’s new favorite ingénue, Scarlett Johansson) and also has a jealous ex (Penelope Cruz) tracking him down. And there’s lots and lots of sex.

The trailer shows little more than short clips of some steamy love scenes all set to a Spanish song, with any dialogue from the movie removed. I would think they would want to market a Woody Allen film as something more than a sensationalized adult film, but what do I know? Well, I do know this: as for this particular Allen film, I’m going to SKIP IT. If it turns out to be his next Annie Hall, I’m sure someone will tell me.

Vicky Cristina Barcelona is rated R and opens in limited release August 29. (Official site)

I love Woody Allen, but I have to admit that I’m a bit of a fair-weather fan. Annie Hall is one of my favorite all-time movies, and because of it, I’ve watched pretty much every movie that Woody Allen has made since.

That is, until I saw Small Time Crooks, which is one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen, and I swore I wouldn’t waste my blind faith on a Woody Allen film ever again. Of course, then he made Match Point, and I was so excited because I thought that Woody Allen had been reborn. And then I saw Scoop, and I realized that he hadn’t.

And therein lies the problem. You never know what you’re going to get with a Woody Allen film: is it going to be the work of the comedic-genius who pretty much defines the word auteur, or is it going to be the work of the past-his-prime director who doesn’t understand the idea of taking a break to recharge your creative battery?

This trailer for Cassandra’s Dream gives me reason to hope, because it seems far more in-line with Match Point than with some of the other busts that have come to define the latter part of Woody Allen’s career. But like I said, you never know what you’re going to get with a Woody Allen film, and this movie could easily be terrible.

I know most die-hard Woody Allen fans will be lining up to see this thing in the theaters, but I am going to wait and RENT IT. I’ve just been disappointed too many times in the past to automatically dole out $11 just because the movie has Woody Allen’s name in the opening credits. Plus, I could really care less about this Colin Farrell guy (didn’t his career end a couple years ago?)

Cassandra’s Dream is rated R and opens January 4. (IMDB page)