I realize that it’s cliche by now to make fun of the asinine behavior of Hollywood, but oh well…

My latest complaint is this Hollywood theory that if something is a success once, they have to do it over and over again, ad nauseum. The first Survivor was a hit, and now every show on my television set is a reality show. Carrie was successful, and I don’t think that there’s been a Stephen King book since that hasn’t been made into a movie. Dark Angel was a popular TV show, and now every movie in theaters is starring Jessica Alba…

And now the latest addition to this trend is this slew of Japanese horror remakes.

Granted, I’m not a big horror fan, so maybe that explains my lack of understanding on this matter, but is it really necessary to remake every horror movie that Japan produces? I mean, how many times can people see a Japanese kid with a white face before they stop being scared by it?

That said, I have to admit that this trailer for The Eye did give me a bit of a chill. And it is sort of a cool Hitchcockian sort of premise that a woman would get an eye-implant and suddenly be able to see into a supernatural world. But alas, I’m just not a big enough horror fan to sign up for this one. Even if it does seem to be the first Japanese horror remake that isn’t completely dominated by white-faced Japanese kids.

No, I’m afraid that The Eye is going to be a SKIP IT for me. On the other hand, if you’re a huge horror fan, you might as well check it out. Either that, or wait until they come out with Halloween 27 or Freddy vs. Jason 12. Gotta love Hollywood…

The Eye is rated R and opens February 1. (Official Site)

Even before I watched this trailer, I knew that 21, the fact-based story of a bunch of MIT students who card-counted their way through Vegas, was going to be a SEE IT for me. For two reasons.

First off, I recently returned from a fairly brutal trip to Vegas, and I love the idea of watching a bunch of college-kids take the casinos for a heap of money.

And secondly, I read the book that this movie is based on (Bringing Down the House), and even though the book was written pretty poorly, the story itself was so good that it didn’t really matter. And with that in mind, I figure that even if this movie isn’t made particularly well, it’s still going to be a fun flick to watch.

Luckily, from the looks of this trailer, it does look like the film was made pretty well. First off, it’s both action-packed and sexually charged, which means that the filmmakers took enough creative liberties in telling this “fact-based” story to ensure that the movie will be even more entertaining than the book. And secondly, even though I’m not a huge fan of this Jim Sturgess guy, I love the idea of seeing both Kevin Spacey and Laurence Fishburne in the same movie.

Like I said, I’m definitely going to see 21 in the theaters. I just hope it doesn’t get me so pumped up that I go back to Vegas and try to win back all the money I recently lost.

21 is rated R and opens March 28. (Official Site)

With a lesser cast, Definitely, Maybe would probably be just another Lifetime Movie of the Week. But the executives were lucky enough to get Ryan Reynolds, Abigail Breslin, Isla Fisher, and Rachel Weisz to star, so the movie gets bumped up from Lifetime original production to movie I’ll probably wait to watch on Lifetime.

Maya (Breslin) asks her father (Reynolds) to tell her the story of how her soon to be divorced parents met. Turns out, dad was a bit of a man-whore back in the day, and there were several women in his life at the time he met his almost ex-wife. So he tells her the story of his relationship with all the women, with some names and events changed to protect the innocent, and Maya must solve the mystery of “which one is my mom”. I find it hard to believe that a kid Maya’s age (somewhere around 10-12 I’d guess) knows nothing about her parent’s history together, but whatever. I’ll still definitely, maybe, possibly, supposedly, indubitably RENT IT.

Definitely, Maybe is rated PG-13 and opens February 14. (Official site)

I have yet to read the novel that The Other Boleyn Girl is based on, but that doesn’t deter from my interest in this trailer. I’m kind of a sucker for period pieces, so showing me images of actors in gowns and ruffled collars piques my interest. Then showing me an alternate look at a major time in history, and I’m pretty much sold.

The Other Boleyn Girl tells the tale of the two Boleyn sisters who wind up competing for the affection of King Henry VIII. Anne, the sister we all learned about in history class, is promised to the king. But then his head is turned when he meets her equally as beguiling sister, Mary. The girls are pitted against each other as rivals, and things go from bad to worse when Anne has problems conceiving a child and must turn to Mary to help her. Because we all know how well Anne’s fertility problems went over with Henry (hint: not well at all).

Natalie Portman and Scarlett Johansson are the Boleyn sisters, and they look as much like natural sisters as Gwyneth Paltrow and myself. But I have no doubt that their performances will detract the audiences focus from this. Eric Bana is King Henry, and hopefully I’ll finally be able to figure out what it is about him that so many other women find so swoon-worthy when I go to SEE IT.

The Other Boleyn Girl is not yet rated and opens February 29. (Official site)

I want to start this post off with a warning (although it may be too late): If you’re like me and you’re going to watch the next Guy Ritchie film no matter how good the preview is, please do not watch this trailer. It gives away far too much about the movie, and I really wish that I could rewind time and unwatch it.

That said, this trailer does prove that Guy Ritchie is finally back to form. After the atrocity known as Swept Away, it looks like Guy Ritchie has finally learned a very valuable lesson: if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

Let’s face it. Guy Ritchie only knows how to make one kind of movie, as he proved by following Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels with Snatch, which was essentially the same film but with the addition of a gibberish-talking Brad Pitt.

But the truth is that although Guy Ritchie may be just a one-trick pony, he is certainly a very talented pony, and his one-trick is pretty damn impressive. And any movie Guy Ritchie makes that doesn’t star his wife will always be a SEE IT for me.

Now if only his marketing guys had as much faith in him as I do…maybe then they wouldn’t feel the need to show me the whole damn movie to try and convince me that it’s worth my 11 bucks.

Revolver is rated R and opens December 7 (although it opened in Europe two years ago…that’s probably a bad sign, but oh well).

You know it’s a bad sign when your initial reaction after watching a trailer is, “Wait, was that a joke?”

And that was exactly my response after watching the trailer for the latest vehicle for Jessica Simpson. Simpson stars as a pampered celebrity (Get the fu** outta here! No, I cannot, it is serious.) who suddenly finds herself broke and humiliated. So naturally, she enlists in the Army, because it will improve her life or something. Cue the dumb blonde jokes, predictable storyline, and an image of me weeping silently for the future of American cinema.

Putting the lameness of the movie itself aside, the trailer for it plays like one of the gag trailers you can find on YouTube (like our featured trailer mash-ups). I figured someone took footage from Private Benjamin (a far superior film about a ditzy blonde in the Army), footage of Simpson being stupid (not hard to find), and footage of Vivica Fox and the Guttenberg kissing their careers good-bye, and mashed them up into this amateurish trailer.

Needless to say, this is a big SKIP IT. The movie doesn’t even have a rating, release date, or official site yet, so there’s hope that this will never find its way to the movie theaters and will languish in the $1.99 DVD bin at Wal-Mart.

Remember that great old computer game, Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego? I loved tracking Carmen and her henchmen all over the world. This isn´t a post about a movie based on the game (that would definitely be a SEE IT for me.) But if you´ve been wondering where my byline has been, here is the answer.

I´ve always dreamed of seeing the world, and now my guy and I are doing just that. For the past month we have been traveling throughout Ecuador and Peru. This is the beginning of a year-long adventure in which we hope to also visit Brazil, Argentina, Chile, Australia, New Zealand, Thailand, Indonesia, Laos, China, India, Kenya, and Tanzania. If you want to follow our adventures, stop by our trip blog, Globestompers.

After watching this trailer for the much anticipated Valkyrie, I had only one thought: how I wish that Kenneth Branagh was playing the lead instead of Tom Cruise. But alas, that’s not the way that Hollywood works.

Now, I hate to pick on our good friend Tom (mostly because it’s just too easy), but he seems totally wrong for this part. Mainly because he just doesn’t know how to not be cocky in a movie. I mean, really, can you think of a single one of his roles where he wasn’t playing a cocky prick? Even in his more critically acclaimed roles (Magnolia, Rain Man, etc), he was still the same self-assured frat-boy he always is. And for this movie, in particular, I’m not sure that kind of persona is warranted.

Granted, in the year 2007, it makes sense that someone would have no qualms about trying to knock off Hitler. But in reality, the Nazis were so good at brain-washing, it’s just common sense that a high-ranking Nazi official would have at least a little doubt about killing the man he was programmed to worship. But you can tell from the trailer that Cruise’s character doesn’t have a doubt in his mind…just like every other character that he’s ever played.

Of course, even with this fairly major qualm, I’m still pretty excited about this movie. There aren’t a whole lot of stories out there that are worthy of being made into a major blockbuster film, and this story definitely fits the bill. Plus, Bryan Singer is a genius, as he proved by successfully reviving the Superman franchise.

Valkyrie will certainly get my $11 when I SEE IT in the theater. However, I’m pretty sure that the failure to successfully kill Hitler won’t be the only thing I’ll be disappointed about when the credits roll. I’m pretty sure I’ll also be wondering how much better the film could have been if they’d cast someone more appropriate for the leading role.

Valkyrie is not yet rated and opens June 27. (IMDB page)

I watched this trailer three times, trying to figure out what exactly was happening in it. A wealthy, happy, and well-liked French man has either a stroke or a heart attack in his fancy car, then appears to enter some sort of fantasy world while he lays paralyzed in the hospital. Or at least that’s what I got out of the trailer. Confusing, sure, but I was still intrigued enough to watch it three times.

Upon further research, I learned that the man is the editor of the French edition of Elle Magazine, and the movie is based on the true story of his life. He suffered a stroke in 1995 that paralyzed his entire body, except for his left eye. With that eye, he managed to blink his memoir and describe the worlds that he was seeing inside his mind. This sounds like fascinating material for a fictional movie, but the fact that it’s based on true story makes it even more compelling, so I’m definitely intrigued enough to RENT IT.

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly is rated PG-13 and opens in limited release November 30. (Official site It’s in French, you’ve been warned)

I love Woody Allen, but I have to admit that I’m a bit of a fair-weather fan. Annie Hall is one of my favorite all-time movies, and because of it, I’ve watched pretty much every movie that Woody Allen has made since.

That is, until I saw Small Time Crooks, which is one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen, and I swore I wouldn’t waste my blind faith on a Woody Allen film ever again. Of course, then he made Match Point, and I was so excited because I thought that Woody Allen had been reborn. And then I saw Scoop, and I realized that he hadn’t.

And therein lies the problem. You never know what you’re going to get with a Woody Allen film: is it going to be the work of the comedic-genius who pretty much defines the word auteur, or is it going to be the work of the past-his-prime director who doesn’t understand the idea of taking a break to recharge your creative battery?

This trailer for Cassandra’s Dream gives me reason to hope, because it seems far more in-line with Match Point than with some of the other busts that have come to define the latter part of Woody Allen’s career. But like I said, you never know what you’re going to get with a Woody Allen film, and this movie could easily be terrible.

I know most die-hard Woody Allen fans will be lining up to see this thing in the theaters, but I am going to wait and RENT IT. I’ve just been disappointed too many times in the past to automatically dole out $11 just because the movie has Woody Allen’s name in the opening credits. Plus, I could really care less about this Colin Farrell guy (didn’t his career end a couple years ago?)

Cassandra’s Dream is rated R and opens January 4. (IMDB page)